Cloudy With a Chance of Bankruptcy and Blowing Chunks

“How’d ya like the movie, Pappy?”

I had taken my 7 year old grand niece and 9 year old grand nephew to see “Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs”.  Their 11 year old sister had seen it and loved it.  We had tried to see it one rainy Saturday two weeks ago but it was sold out.

I picked them up after school on Tuesday, traditionally the slowest day at movie theaters, and off we went.

It was in 3-D which seems to be the new normal.  Last year when a movie was in 3-D, you also had the option of seeing the “regular” movie.  That choice appears to be gone.  Now, you have to see the 3-D movie and that of course costs substantially more, even in a matinee.  Three of us for a matinee cost $39. I bought them some lunch and then movie snacks and before I had put on my 3-D glasses I had spent $79.50 in total.

I didn’t realize the 3-D was on your wallet as well.

Perhaps that soured my mood for the movie but I don’t think so.   In my years of movie going, this one ranks somewhere near the absolute bottom and if I had waited to buy them lunch AFTER the movie, there would have no takers.  All this monstrous food dropping from the sky, enlarged and growing at alarming rates was so repulsive that I’m going to suggest  the movie to my Weight Watcher meeting.   If you are struggling to eat within your points per day, this movie will reduce your intake to zero.

No, I mean it. I felt sick for two days after seeing this movie.

The kids?

They loved the movie but I noticed no one ran home and opened the refrigerator but just ran to the bathroom.

When I asked them, “Seriously, what did that huge gigantic brown greasy pulsating mother of a galactic meatball look like to you?”

My grand niece started gagging.

Yep, apparently, she hadn’t thought of it at the time she was watching it, but got my drift.

What are great aunts for if not to speak the truth while filing for bankruptcy?

And, one more thing.

Who needs Roger Ebert with a quality movie review such as this?

©Pat Coakley 2009


3 comments on “Cloudy With a Chance of Bankruptcy and Blowing Chunks”

  1. rofl – well there ya go! First of all… you go girl! I loved this post. From someone who suffers from a Neurological condition I have to tell you that I don’t really appreciate the move towards 3D, flash photography and all of the other clever little things they feel we need to enjoy our moviegoing experience these days. Furthermore… movies lets just face it.. Hollywood has lost any sense of class or taste it has ever had. The classic British fart joke/ farce has become something far less classy – if that could ever be possible. It makes me shake my head.

    Then they have the nerve to charge you ridiculous amounts of money to watch these shall we say… uh.. masterpieces? Nah, give me netflix and my big screen any day. I have a 15 minute rule in my house. If I can’t stand the movie after 15 minutes, it goes off… PERIOD. I also don’t have to stick to the floor, listen to rude people talking, eating, or texting on their cell phones through the movie either.

    Maybe Im just grumpy and old… who knows. Im with ya sister!

  2. Nice shot.

    Most kid’s movies are crap (come to think about it, most movies are rubbish) but then there are a few that are pretty good and show that some people can still make good movies for children whilst still entertaining the adults. I was thinking about movies like “the Incredibles” and “Finding Nemo”.

    I’m with Amber though, on not wanting to go to the movies and having to put up with those jerks who can’t watch a movie without making a racket, by either commenting to the friends ad nauseum, or stuffing their faces with things with noisy wrappers.

  3. Pat – low-flying giant meatballs that resemble um er blurrrrgh? No thanks. I’m with you on movie rip-off prices. The last time we went to a cinema we paid the equivalent price of two brand new DVDs, BEFORE they get discounted, and two small water bottles cost as much as a big glass of wine. I know which I’d prefer and it ain’t the water. Then, because we made the massive error of going after work one evening, we dozed off half-way through, making it a total waste of money. From now on, we’re sticking to DVD rentals. That way you can doze off and replay when you wake up and it doesn’t cost an absolute fortune. PS has anyone in movie theatres noticed that we’re in a recession? Not in this country and sounds like not in yours, either.

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