About This Blob, I mean Blog

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Single for a Reason®

– A Photo/Word/Video/Blog -or “Blob” as my cousin Mary calls it- for Choosy People-

(2009 National Society of Newspaper Columnists “Blog Column” Winner)

Select photographs from this blog and my larger archive are now available for sale and download at:


When I was younger (and unmarried) my friends and family said I was too choosy and picky. As I got older and still hadn’t married, they began thinking my ex-boyfriends were the choosy and too picky ones. Now, at 64, they realize what readers of the blog should handily discover: solo living has its own charms as well as challenges, even though none are tax deductible.

Singledom is increasing along with the aging baby boomers. In 2005, it was estimated by the US Census that there were 89 million unmarried or single Americans and no one seems to market to us except hydraulic and enlargement specialists and, frankly, we’ve been there done that years ago and is the territory of other blogs. ( I contend without a national poll that I am the only unmarried 64 year old woman without a cat, dog, gerbil or anything of a winged or animal nature.  Don’t hold it against me.  I like pets on others.)

In my former life I was a school psychologist and career counselor, speaker and freelance writer. Currently, I am a photographer and writer in search of the right potting soil.

If you don’t want to leave home, I am a good travel guide. Single people need to define a good time loosely.

I can find lost civilizations without a passport or photo ID. Here are a few entries that will give you a good idea of what this blog is about. I just go to the GROCERY STORE to experience technology and shame at the same time. ANTS ON PEONIES? Fascinating. I’m there–hovering. HD video recorder in hand. Makes me think of presidential politics. If you mess with my sandwich bread, I WRITE LETTERS TO BREAD PEOPLE. MODERN ART IN PARKING LOTS?FIND IT IMPOSSIBLE TO OPEN A PACKAGE? Shepard Fairey, look out!   Film it and realize that the terrorists really are winning. FEELING HOPELESS AND ALONE? I have an image for you that requires no explanation although I give one. My take on “”SEX IN THE CITY” is closer to assisted living than a penthouse on Park Avenue. Do you know a woman who won’t leave home without her make-up? HOW ABOUT IF THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE?

I am fond of writing and photographing moments that are part of a series.

Behind the Wheel
Art is Where You Find It
Before the Storm
Trucks and Trains
Waiting for the Resurrection
Driving to the Inaugural
Regret Prevention
Asphalt Art
Photography for Shut Ins
Anxiety 2.0
Fear, The Series

“Driving to the Inaugural, The Series” included 13 posts over the course of six days, all posted without leaving my house.  “Art is Where You Find it, The Series”  is as close to a mantra as I have.   Dealing with financial anxiety?  You have come to the right place.  Any post starting around September 15th of 2008 reflects my white knuckles in word and image.  My series on Anxiety 2.0 and Fear, The Series are ongoing.  I shall never run out of material for these topics.

In fact, anyone with an anxiety disorder or treating those with one will be well compensated by perusing this blog.  I freak out with a dash of creativity.

I know nothing can rival the pharmacy in matters of true agitation, but may I suggest “creativity” with a small c  as an elixir of the gods? It is built in to all of us,  requires no script and, in addition, we can operate heavy machinery or moving vehicles while under its spell.

Waving or Drowning is a website I began in June, 2009 in concert with assisting my town’s senior center with its Caregiving Support Group.  It shall focus periodically on the invisible people, caregivers all,  (you know who you are) in fiction as well as non-fiction stories and it’s name comes from a poem by  Stevie Smith, the British Poet, who wrote of being in water far too deep and far too cold for far too long, but when she finally realizes her peril and lifts her arms to get help–people on the shore think she’s just waving, “hello”.

Welcome to my world where I wave and drown on a daily basis.

This blog, “Single for a Reason™” is available on WordPress and at www.singleforareason.com.

At  singularsensation.wordpress.com you can see photos of flora and fauna and get photo tips for photographing mother nature that also lowers your cholesterol during the New England growing season, May to September.

If I can ever figure out how to do it without needing some TARP funds, I’ll integrate all my “stuff” one day under my real name site: www.patcoakley.com which currently displays all the photographs that are for sale for print or download.

My YOUTUBE name is “w1kkp”, the ID of my father’s ham radio persona years and years ago when the world was flat and dinosaurs roared.  One video I took of NY Yankees Alex Rodriquez coming to the plate at Fenway Park on Mother’s Day, 2007, has been viewed 5000+ times with appropriate neanderthal comments suitable to Yankee/Red Sox fans, of which I am one.

And, if that is not enough media exposure for this one invisible person, I’m on Facebook and a bit creeped out by its insistence on having friends and I twitter through the ‘w1kkp’ name, but not often.  My life simply doesn’t have a breaking news quality.  Yet.

Thanks for visiting.

Email: pbc@patcoakley.com

24 comments on “About This Blob, I mean Blog”

  1. Thanks for this lovely BLOG.
    I spend all of this rainy Saturday morning here reading and watching…
    …being in Europe you often look out to this far away strange country using .com extensions and wonder…
    Your BLOG makes me think there are actually a lot more interesting great people there than I had so far the pleasure to meet.

    I love the most, that I feel like reading a good book full of short stories when I look at your notes.

    Thanks for that.

  2. I think your blog is great (then again, I knew it would be after reading your comments elsewhere!) Now please excuse me while I go grab my iPod and subscribe to your podcast right now!

  3. Sannekurz, thank you so much for visiting. I think I emailed you but with my memory I could have thought I emailed you and didn’t! I’m going to look at some more of your movies today. It will be a nice way to not think about this election!
    Jimmuse, yes, I recognize you, too! I have only done about 5 podcasts and none since April! I started out house a fire and then went into the deep freeze. I’ll let you know if I start up again! Thanks for dropping by!

  4. Pat- would you see if my email address shows up correctly now.
    Thank you. Wou

  5. yikes- I hit submit too soon. Would you let me know by email was the rest of that sentence.

  6. Pat:

    Aside from the other good and interesting stuff in your “about”, I was attracted to your screen name as I immediately recognized it as ham radio call letters, from the New England region. I was licensed many years ago, from around 1957-1980 or so–possibly at a time that your father was active.

    Bill Fabrey, Woodstock, NY
    formerly K2TLP (ham radio, not YouTube)

  7. You are right, Bill. My Dad was active through those years! Oh, I can hear his voice right now saying those letters. He would love that I use them as my screen name now in cyberspace. Nice that you recognized them as from New England!

  8. One is reminded of Jody Foster’s character in the film “Contact”, I believe, in which her dad was a ham radio operator, and she grew up especially interested in the world around her–just like you! :-)

  9. You might want to see if a ham radio club near you would be kind enough to adopt your father’s old call as an “in memoriam” call. The FCC allows hams to claim calls that belonged to previously licensed individuals, pretty much at whim, and it’s just a matter of time before someone with the initials “KKP” decides that “W1KKP” would be a nice call to have.

    Alternatively, you could get a license, and claim the call yourself.

  10. Kelley, what a great suggestion! I wish one of my Dad’s ham friends would have made this same suggestion when he died which was (gulp) twenty years ago today. No one would smile more if I got a ham radio license I can tell you that. In my way, this voyage into the blog and my embrace of technology is my way of being a living “in memoriam”. I still find myself saying, “Oh, I wish I could call him and tell him about HD TV or the IPHONE…” On an on. Thanks for taking the time.

  11. Twenty years ago it wasn’t an option. The “in memoriam” club vanity call sign option has only been around since 1998 or so. Before then, people never really expected that the FCC would “recycle” silent key calls, and so hams all believed that when a call went silent, it would stay that way.

    It’s easier now to get a ham license now than ever; the code tests were finally eliminated last year, and at least the introductory level (technician) license is easy enough that most people can master enough of the material to pass the test with reasonable study.

  12. Well, the first step might be to find out whether the call has already been reassigned and is currently in use. There used to be a printed directory, and probably still is, and I can’t believe that the information isn’t accessible online, too. For example, my K2TLP call sign may have been recycled at any time over the last 25 years after I let it lapse.

    It is even possible that the FCC has an online ham radio licensing department with a searcheable call sign database.

    Kelly is right that a smart person (like yourself) could probably, with a little study and/or tutoring, pass the technician license. Maybe 10-15 hours might do it, but I haven’t seen the test in years.

    Publications that can help are put out by the ARRL (American Radio Relay League) in Connecticut, and they have online help as well. The chances are fairly good that your father was a member, as I was. They might even have a record of that. Their URL is: http://www.arrl.org/

    Tests usually include some technical stuff and some regulatory stuff.

  13. The call has not yet been reassigned. (Neither has yours, Bill.) You can look up wireless licensees (which include amateurs) on the FCC’s website at http://wireless2.fcc.gov/UlsApp/UlsSearch/searchLicense.jsp

  14. Thanks, that’s good to know, Kelly! I have bookmarked the address you gave.

    Pat, I notice that suddenly, email notifications that I receive from this thread are going out with an extra http at the front, with the result that the links, if clicked on, do not come here, but Google says the site can not be found.

  15. Kelley and Bob– First, thank you so much for your interest and information. What makes me smile about this is that this is what I remember about my father’s ham friends: they were always so helpful! A fountain of information always and those who lived closer would come by and they would work on a antennae problem (I remember the days with the huge platform antennae outside the house so there always seemed to be an antennae problem!

    Who knows? I just might do this license thing while I’m trying to reinvent myself !

    Bill,the email notification double “http” sounds like a wordpress issue and I’ll pass it on. I think that is a fairly new feature so they are probably having some newbie issues with it.

    Again, thanks, to you both!!

  16. Yes, hams are well known for being friendly and helpful, for the most part. It comes from having a hobby in which you feel like a pioneer of sorts, and you are out of the mainstream, but other radio amateurs understand and speak your lingo. Also, antenna work often takes a village, so to speak, especially in erecting a tower!

    Years ago, it was rare for a woman to have an amateur license–it was a very technical pursuit. Those that did, were highly prized by the rest of us. To save time using the morse code, a woman, licensed or not, was termed a “YL” (young lady) unless she was married, in which she was termed an XYL. The column in the ARRL magazine dedicated to female hams was called “YL News and Views”, I think. I wonder if it still is. There are far more female radio amateurs today, I suspect.

    Looks like WordPress may have corrected the problem. The double http has disappeared, and I accessed this readily by clicking on the link in the email notification of a new post on this thread.

    Maybe you need a different thread dedicated to ham radio? I feel funny typing all this on your “about” page! LOL

  17. Hi, I wrote you a kinda long intro here a few days ago and now I don’t see it anywhere. Did you ever get it?

  18. No, psychsribe, I didn’t get it!! I just checked my email history as well. Although, why do I feel I have heard from you? Oh, this is maddening! I appreciate your effort.

  19. I hope you have a GREAT BIRTHDAY!

  20. I’ve always seen you comment on planetross’ blog, and so I decided to check out your blog. Your photography is incredible! I think I’ll be back.

  21. OK, now I’m borderline stalking you…. LOL!

    Great stuff. Enjoy reading/watching/viewing it all.

  22. I am really enjoying your blog. So excited to have found it, and giddy that you’re getting a kick out of mine!

  23. Your blog is really interesting and inspiring for a 21 year old person who is known for being a little choosy as well… Thanks for posting all you do and I’ll be back for more! Happy New Year!

  24. Thank you, wisdomunconventional, for commenting here! A little choosy never hurt a girl, nor a little money (as my mother used to say)! I went to your site and love your header photograph and your riff on snuggies or whatever those things are called! We love what we love no matter what our age!

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